For what were Star Wars figures and other toys built but everlasting war? Mine are more than 30 years old and still have plenty of fight in them!

NOT REALLY A TABLE OF CONTENTS. MORE LIKE A GUIDE:

Part 1: Introduction (sort of)

Part 3: Vader’s nefarious gambit

Part 4: Battle for Echo Base

Part 7: Star Trek TNG crashes a Star Wars party

Part 10: Luke mans up

Part 13: When Star Wars and Star Trek meet

Part 16: Deanna’s kidnapped!

Part 18: The fastest ship in the fleet takes flight

Part 24: Our heroes embark on a long and frankly disturbing hike through my basement

Part 25: Vader teaches Troi some tricks of the trade

Part 27: Boba Fett has a job to do

Part 30: Barbie dolls, I mean action figures, take the field

Part 34: A visit from the Prequelers

Part 47: Enterprise and Falcon vs. the Borg

Part 51: New friends join the party

Part 58: Rescue plan put in motion

Part 65: A new dark force rises

Part 68: Fortress breached

Part 69: Troi has some special news

Part 70: Superman? Sure, why not?

Part 78: Fleet engagement, heavy capital warships, in my living room

Part 79: Vader vs. Vader

Part 83: Everyone, let’s gather in the hanger bay and fight!

Part 88: Down toilet plan goes. New plan, you must make

Part 91: Snoopys take things into their own paws.

Part 93: The situation heats up in the Falcon.

Part 95: Bombs away!

Part 98: Cease fire, or regrouping, whichever

Part 99: Deanna gives a speech

Part 100: A new faction joins the fight. And Part 100 – woot woot!

Part 104: Snoopys fly into battle!

Part 107: Victory but at what cost in this absurdly long 22-panel strip!

Part 111: Wedge embarks on a new mission, off the books.

Part 112: Yet another new threat? You betcha!

Part 116: Time for some Q-and-A.

Part 117: A peek into the “real world.”

Part 119: A visitor from the future!

Part 122: Consulting with ornament oracles!

Part 124: Deanna gets a check up.

Part 125: All aboard, Enterprise heading out!

Part 127: Falcon’s fixed and ready to go.

Part 128: Working things out on the home front.

Part 130: Rescue mission time for Wedge and Artoo!

Part 141: Smitty has a rescue mission of his own.

Part 144: Han, Leia, Wishbone, and Threepio arrive in Snoopy land!

Part 149: The Enterprise approaches enemy territory.

Part 150: Luke deals with newcomers in the living room.

Part 152: The away team meets some refugees.

Part 157: Ben and Lone Ranger return to the basement for some extra stuff.

LRW RULES

Unlike some other stories with toys, these toys’ weapons and vehicles work, especially on each other. They know what they are, but most tend to block that out in favor of their immediate occupations or missions. They definitely don’t care if they’re played with or not! So far, cats have been able to perceive them and their activities, but not adult humans. Their memories and life experiences are based on when they were made – i.e. Luke remembers Hoth, Dagobah, and Cloud City, but not Jabba’s palace or Endor. They’re made of plastic so they can take more damage from blasters and stuff, but unfortunately for them can still feel pain and/or die.

No cats are harmed in the making of this blog.

-Phil Custodio

THE CAST:

First, the cats:

Henry was born on the streets in northern Flint, Michigan, and was kidnapped/rescued/adopted when he was a kitten, back in 1998. He’s named after the school he was found wandering near! Mellow but with a short temper, his biggest frustration in life is humans regarding his displays of anger as cute! He’s not too thrilled with his new web comic production schedule because it cuts into his naptime.

Emma was adopted as a kitten in 2007 from an animal hospital in Clarkston, Michigan. She is an absolute princess, and a good actress. She always hits her mark and never complains about reshoots.

Gypsy was rescued as a kitten from the woods in Clarkston in 2010, and I gave her a home. A real scamp, she has been a thorn in Emma’s side since the day she arrived and usurped her role as the baby of the family. She is always up for some action scenes, especially if she gets to knock down a snowspeeder or two.

 

THE EMPIRE:

Darth Vader, Dark Lord of the Sith. His objectives are familiar: take over the galaxy! His galaxy has changed a bit, but that doesn’t matter. Power is power. But things get cloudy where his son is concerned.

General Sebastian Creebe, former commander of the infamous Death Squad who has risen through the ranks to become second-in-command over all imperial forces. He answers only to Darth Vader, and he better answer quickly and without question!

Stormtrooper: the unflinching soldier of the Empire (except when cats are around). There are many like him.

Snowtrooper: comrade in arms to the ubiquitous stormtrooper. Often fights right alongside them.

REBELS:

Luke Skywalker, Jedi Knight and rebel general, as devoted to justice and freedom as his father is to tyranny and control. Wields a lightsaber, but not above getting behind the controls of a snowspeeder if needed.

Col. Norris Tapfer commands Echo Base, when it is intact. He’s in charge of all rebel troops and is second only to Gen. Skywalker, but is still handy with a blaster rifle.

Cpl. Smitty or any of the other brave soldiers fighting for freedom in the rebel army. They operate the big guns, scout locations from the back of a tauntaun, or even ride backseat in a snowspeeder.

Maj. Antilles, Lt. Kohlman and the other courageous pilots of the rebel alliance fly snowspeeders, X-wings, even star cruisers if they can get their hands on any. They’re not averse to picking up a blaster pistol or rifle and slugging it out on the ground, though.

Maggie, the rebels’ loyal tauntaun. She carries alliance officers on important missions, packs critically needed supplies, and isn’t above a cavalry charge or two.

ENTERPRISE CREW:

Captain Jean Luc Picard

Commander of the Enterprise, determined to carry out his mission of exploration and discovery despite the strange world in which he finds himself.

Commander Will Riker

First officer. Bound by Starfleet’s Prime Directive, but unsure how it applies in the struggle between the Empire and rebels struggling against it.

Commander Beverly Crusher

Chief medical officer. Left without much of a crew to treat, the doctor is driven to help all those in need of it.

Commander Deanna Troi

Ship’s counselor, but also somewhat adrift because she has no crew to counsel. She’s had to deal with a new patient, lately.

Lt. Commander Data

Enterprise’s chief operations officer, who’s also an android. He may have an advantage over his human companions in dealing with their new situation in that he’s always been an artificial lifeform.

Lt. Commander Geordi LaForge

Helmsman, in charge of flying the Enterprise out of whatever dangers they face.

THE BARBIES

Mallorie, brave in battle, trusted to hold the line against anyone or anything threatening her and her friends. She has a soft spot for anyone risking his life for her, though.

China, a loyal friend who can always be depended on to help.

Cali has taken on leadership responsibilities for her band of Barbies, a difficult challenge in a world filled with enemies, but also friends as well.

Midge, entrusted with keeping an eye on things so no one gets the drop on her fellow Barbies!

NEW REBELS:

Han Solo, space pirate and rebel leader.

Princess Leia, well equipped for combat in her Bossk outfit.

Wishbone, fights for truth and justice just like Robin Hood after whom he is dressed.

Arcturus Rann, last of his Micronaut people who may have recently reached an untimely end…

 

 

Mike Power, member of the elite GI Joe Adventure Team. Due to the times he was made, he didn’t come with a gun, but he’s taken care of that oversight.

John Reid, the Lone Ranger. As opposed to killing as ever, but not so much to bouncing a few silver bullets off stormtrooper armor!

Mikuru Asahina, time traveling school girl from the world of Japanese anime.